Today, there are many who believe that masturbation is a good thing and even a healthy thing. So is masturbation healthy or is it unhealthy? Is it good or is it bad?
What are the two main reasons for sex? The intimate bonding of a husband and wife and openness to new life. Is there bonding between a husband and wife in masturbation? No. Is there openness to new life in masturbation? No. Any time we take one or both of these reasons for sex out of the equation, we are misusing the gift of our sexuality and ultimately we will not be happy because we are not living God's plan for our human sexuality.
Masturbation can also be harmful in relationships because it trains someone to look at sex as being merely for one's own pleasure. When one gets married, it can be difficult for them to see sex as a way to express love for their spouse and as a way to create new life.
Much of our culture is self-centered. Many of us have been poisoned to believe that if we don't gratify every one of our sexual urges we are putting our sexuality in the dark and somehow denying ourselves something we deserve. Every one has sexual feelings and sex is a good thing! God created us to desire it. But above our sexual feelings, we have our ability to reason and the power to control ourselves. By saying no to sex before marriage, we are saying yes to sex after and for marriage. When we are tempted to want sex, we can pray for the grace to live chastity and witness God empowering us to live according to his plan. Taking things out of our life that encourage negative sexual feelings such as pornography is an important and helpful step. It's also important to remind ourselves that every desire we have is a reminder of our ultimate desire for God in heaven. When we have sexual feelings, we can take that time to remember that we want to be united with God (non-sexually) in heaven and use it as an opportunity for prayer.