Friday, February 5, 2010

Question Box Friday: Should a man lead in the relationship?

Question: Should a man lead in the relationship?
Answer: Yes, a man should take the lead in relationships and a woman should be strong enough to let the man lead and help him to lead. This is something that I really have struggled to understand as a strong, independent woman. Our culture has taught women and men to be strong and not to rely on others because that is a sign of weakness.

Masculinity is about strength, leadership, and being the protector. A man's body is designed to be the giver and the woman's body is designed to receive the man. Biologically speaking the woman opens herself up in order to receive the man. Our emotions work in much of the same way. A woman should let a man know that she is interested by making herself available and opening herself up to the man. The man should take initiative and pursue the woman.

Practical advice...When I was in high school, I had a friend who always "HAD TO HAVE A BOYFRIEND". She would chase after a guy until he would start dating her. These relationships were always very short before she would get bored and move on to the next guy. Girls connect more quickly emotionally and may jump from having a crush on someone to planning the wedding in a matter of minutes or months. It doesn't happen the same way for guys, they may not even catch on that a girl is interested in them. Therefore in order to allow the guy the time he needs to think about the relationship progressing, girls need to slow down, be patient and let the guy take initiative.

I'm not saying that girls should be timid, passive, or weak. It is 100% okay to let a guy know that you are interested in him. But, then we need to be patient and wait for him to process through the idea of starting a relationship. Every girl wants to be swept off her feet. This isn't possible if we jump the gun and take initiative in the relationship. A true sign of feminity is the ability to be open and to receive.

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